Hurt People Hurt People

Hurt people often hurt people.


Yesterday I had a friend bravely share some difficult things with me. She has been told she should feel shame for being born white. She and her husband have been mistreated in places across the country, and even spit on. She and some friends feel it’s becoming dangerous for white people in this country, and she wanted to share a different perspective. 


I find it incredibly disheartening to know there are people who have been treated poorly, who then feel justified in treating others the same way. 


That is not okay, does not solve anything, and it’s embarrassing. 


For many centuries, a group of people as a whole has been disregarded, oppressed, and abused. That’s not to say no one else has suffered. I am not disregarding anyone else’s pain. Today I am writing about a large group of people I belong to. And yes, I know there are prominent, prosperous Black people in our country who have done well. I won’t go into a whole explanation of the roadblocks and difficulties many of them dealt with to get there. As a whole, the opportunities have not been the same for everyone. 


Though I don’t agree it’s becoming dangerous for white people as a whole in this country, I know those kinds of experiences can be a setback for the healing we are trying to find.


Please understand I am in no way, shape, or form suggesting they are justified in their actions against white people. I am just trying to give you perspective as to why some might behave in this way. As my friend pointed out, it is similar to a person who was abused as a child, becoming an abuser. It’s heartbreaking in every way. 


There is no justification for hate. 


We could go back and forth paying people back for the harm they have caused us, but when does it end? 


If this has happened to you in any way, please don’t allow it to hold you back from finding empathy for those who are hurting. Please don’t allow it to make you close your ears and invalidate real experiences. It’s going to take each one of us to respond in a loving way regardless of what comes at us. I know it’s hard, but it’s what Jesus did. Pray we see each other the way our Creator does.


Be the difference.


“See that no one repays another with evil for evil, but always seek after that which is good for one another and for all people.” - 1 Thessalonians 5:15




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