Christina Speaks

I can’t stop looking at this picture. Do you see what I see? I see hope for a day when the only thing people will see when they look at this precious soul covered in brown skin, is the beauty that shines from the inside out, the love of Christ that lives inside, and the wonder of an almighty Creator who made him in His very own image. This is my son. As he walks toward an uncertain future, I ask you to petition the Lord on his behalf. I ask that you look at this beautiful boy and allow him to represent every brown boy and girl who walks this earth and pray for them too. Pray for your own children and ask that God fill them with the love of Christ that sees each of their differences, sees their beauty, and embraces every bit of it. Pray each of us can look at ourselves in the mirror, see God inside, and love us too. Maybe that is part of the problem. So many of us walk in guilt and shame. “The devil knows your name but calls you by your sin. God knows your sin but calls you by your name...

Thank you. Yesterday I shared my heart, and you shared yours right back. I am deeply moved by your show of solidarity, and grateful for your words of love and support for your hurting brothers and sisters. Continue sharing that love and showing support for the next s everal days, weeks, months, and years. Don’t stop, even when you grow weary. Yesterday, I felt burdened and pensive. Today I feel optimistic. I can see hope rising over the horizon. Can you see it? Can you feel it? It’s brilliant and warm and breaking through the darkness. Brighter days are coming. I just know it. You did that. You gave me hope. You listened, you shared, you learned, and you spoke up. You saw me.  Some of you even took time to see yourself in a way you hadn’t before. Continue on the path of intentionality to a place of racial reconciliation. Recognize the true enemy. It’s a long and bumpy road, so make friends along the way. Make a friend that looks different from you, comes from a different place than...

My heart is heavy and I want to open it to you. I don’t write much about this issue because I’ve always felt like my words as a woman of color didn’t carry as much weight with a predominately white audience. I figured the general consensus would be “Of course she thinks there’s a problem, she’s black.” I never wanted to come off as militant or over-sensitive. So I’ve remained silent. This is a common problem among many people with skin like mine. So words cannot adequately express my gratitude for my white brothers and sisters who are hurt, moved, angry enough to not just recognize, but speak up and out against the blatant racism that plagues our country. I want to go numb. I don’t want to feel any of this. Generally, when I see the stories pop up on various feeds, I feel that twinge of pain so...I move on. I’ve got to guard my heart. Right? Well, no more. It’s time to speak. I’m not going to voice my anger. I won’t scream about my outrage. I will just tell you that it hurts. I’m in ph...

So I’ve been trying to figure out (as I’m sure many of us are) what the heck is going on? I think we’ve all lost our minds! Okay, maybe not all of us, but there’s more than a handful of crazy going around.  I think I found part of the problem during my reading of yes, you know I bring it up every week… Get Out of Your Head by Jennie Allen.  We are struggling with cynicism. I didn’t think I had any kind of cynicism in me until I looked at the definition of a cynic: a person who believes that people are motivated purely by self-interest rather than acting for honorable or unselfish reasons.  I must admit, I have dealt with this quite a bit lately. Here are some things I learned from Jennie Allen... Cynicism erodes our ability to see God rightly. It interprets the world and God based on past hurts we have experienced and forces us to look horizontally at people rather than vertically to God.  Okay. Yeah, I do that sometimes. Just yesterday, after watching some very dist...

If you have been with me for a while here, you know that I usually like to focus on God’s love for each of us and do my best to stay away from controversial issues. That hasn’t changed, but what I have to share today might be bothersome to some of you. I have stopped myself from commenting an innumerable amount of times on the thoughts of others I find to be hurtful. I confess, I’m not always innocent. Just the other day I called Americans spoiled brats. What I meant by that was we (thankfully) have so much freedom in this country that we often forget the difference between our rights and what’s right. We each have the right to say whatever we want...but should we? Understand there is a difference between sharing your beliefs and personally attacking someone with them. If you are unable to share your thoughts and opinions without the element of shaming or attacking, then I believe it’s important to stay quiet. In the illustrious words of the rapper, Ice Cube, “Check yourself before you...

It happened again. I learned some stuff. It was during book club (Get Out of Your Head by Jennie Allen). While we were talking, I realized there is still an issue I struggle with. I continue to tell you all not to believe the lies the evil one is feeding you, but it has become a problem for me. My friend Beth explained it so well when she compared it to a person with anorexia. No matter what they are told, they continue to see something other than the truth when they look in the mirror. They have a dysmorphic view of their bodies. It takes ongoing therapy to change their distorted beliefs and thoughts about themselves.  The same is true concerning the lies I believe about myself. Lately, it doesn’t matter what positive words I am given, I struggle to believe them.  “They are just saying that because they love me.”  “They don’t want to hurt my feelings.” “They are just a really encouraging and positive person.” “They probably need something...

The other day, after working in the yard I came in to wash my super dirty hands. I noticed how dirty the suds were as I rubbed my hands together increasing the brown lather with every swipe.  Obviously I would have to wash my hands more than once to get them clean. I rinsed the dirty suds, then pumped the hand soap for another try at cleanliness.  Again I lathered my hands up, which were closer to clean the second time around, but still showed signs of dirt. One more round should do it. The third time was the charm As I lathered up, I felt satisfied with the snow-white suds that finally appeared. I rinsed them off, then noticed I still had dirt under my nails. Good grief! What a process just to get my hands clean. I was slightly irritated by how long it was taking to be clean again. It’s exactly how I feel when there is something in my life I need to clean up or change. . .  A sin or a bad habit I seem to get a handle on, then realize at some point, it’s still a struggle....