Christina Speaks

This week I will be sharing straight from the Source (The Bible). Each day I will share something from each chapter of Colossians. This particular book of the Bible speaks clearly about how we should be conducting ourselves as Christ-followers even today.   Please do not discard it because it's not a personal story or reflection. Find your own story inside of it and how God is speaking to you.   HE IS SPEAKING TO YOU.   I will be sharing the Message version of these scriptures. Please take the time to look at other versions as well. I will not be interacting this week, but look forward to reading what these scriptures say to you and your heart concerning your place in this world and this country today. I would love to see your discussions when I come back at the end of the week.     “We look at this Son and see the God who cannot be seen. We look at this Son and see God’s original purpose in everything created. For everything, absolutely everything, above and below, visible and inv

Do the hard things. They keep telling me that, but I don’t want to. . . they’re hard. I often throw mini temper tantrums because I know my Heavenly Father has given me an assignment or ten, and I just don’t think I have it in me. In fact, I KNOW I can’t do it on my own. I want to give up. In fact, just yesterday I looked at the task in front of me and asked God, “Do I have to?” I didn’t have to wait for an answer because I know He wouldn’t have given it to me if it was optional. What I had to remind myself, and what I want to remind you of, is if He leads you to it, He’ll lead you through it. God will give you all the tools you need to complete your assignment. . . but you have to take them. I know I can’t do it, but I also know HE can. And He lives in me, so if I am obedient, guess what? It’s going to happen and it’s going to be Ah-mazing, because my God is bigger than any of those things that look too hard for me. I will stop shrinking back, believing that those big things are too mu

There is an issue I have seen, and have been guilty of being a part of myself. There are “Christians” who know stuff about Christ, who talk about Him and maybe even read the Bible regularly, but their life doesn’t reflect the love of Christ. Unless we spend time in intimate fellowship with Him, living a productive fruit-bearing life as a disciple, it means nothing. Dr. Tony Evans discussed the importance of an intimate relationship with Christ, pointing to John 15. “Remain in me, as I also remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me. “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. If you do not remain in me, you are like a branch that is thrown away and withers; such branches are picked up, thrown into the fire and burned. If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for yo

I was talking with a friend one day, and during our conversation, she said she wasn't happy. My first instinct was to rush to her psychological aid and list all of the reasons she should be happy. Then it occurred to me. . .  I'm not happy either. I realized there had been a dark cloud hovering over my head for a while.  It was not the cloud of depression. It was a cloud of dissatisfaction, discontentment, and the looming question: What if this is it? I have always been very uncomfortable with the phrase "I'm not happy." That's the line in the movie, when spoken, you know is leading to divorce, suicide, mid-life crisis shenanigans, etc. However, it was and is a reality. Sometimes I'm not happy, but that’s okay. The fact of the matter is I am not happy with the current state of our nation. I am not happy with certain things about myself. I’m not happy I can’t go on vacation. I’m not happy I have a foot that hurts all the time. I’m not rich. I can’t fly, an

Most of you know, I am a mother of three. Those who only know me from afar have told me how they feel I am such a good mom. I always think to myself, "If you only knew." I mean I AM a good mom (at least compared to the women I see on the news), and my children love me like crazy. However, I mess up a lot. I love my children the best I can with the tools I’ve been given, but I am not always nice. In fact...I'm just going to spill it. I often threaten my kids, telling them I will punch them in the throat. Go ahead, judge me. Really, I have always said it jokingly, because Lord knows, that is something I would NEVER do. But I tell you the truth, I have pictured doing it. I call it Imagination Therapy. Be honest. You have pictured throwing one of your kids out of a window when they have back talked or said something disrespectful. IT'S OKAY. It doesn't mean you're a bad parent. It's one thing to imagine it, and quite another to not know where that boundary lin

A few years ago, I joined a club I never had any desire to be a member of. It’s not like I ever looked down on people who were already members…. It’s just that I didn’t think I was like them. I shared my story then, and I want to share it again for my sisters (and brothers) who are struggling. Yes, this is longer than normal, but I hope and pray it helps you not feel so alone. So yeah, we all know my son Isaiah almost died. We have had, and continue to have challenges, but I mean was happy. Yeah. Yep. Absolutely. Happy. Right? Wrong. When I finally sat back and really considered what I couldn’t ignore, I realized I wasn’t happy. Sure, I had the “joy joy joy joy down in my heart,” but it was DEEP down. I could usually find it, but it was not bubbling up to the surface of each day as it had before. Some days I felt like I had to put my deep-sea diving gear on to find it.  For months, I didn't “feel good.” I couldn’t pinpoint what it was. I just [physically] felt bad. I was tired all

It’s been almost 3 months since George Floyd was killed by a police officer in Minneapolis, Minnesota. Since then, we have seen racial unrest like we hadn’t seen since the time of the Civil Rights Movement in the 50s and 60s.  I haven’t spoken much on the subject in several weeks, because the emotional exhaustion over it, was affecting my mental and physical health, and I needed time to breathe. Please bear with me as I share today. Because there are facts that remain. I am still black. It is still happening. I am still hurt and affected by the hate continuing to be perpetuated throughout this country. And no matter what your shade of skin. . . you should be too.  Though many have decided to pretend it’s not happening (I totally get it. It sucks, and I wish I could pretend it didn’t exist), there are still protests, still people being killed because their looks are “unsavory,” and still pain brought on by movement of the enemy. His purpose remains to steal, kill, and destroy (John 10:1

“We now have this light shining in our hearts, but we ourselves are like fragile clay jars containing this great treasure. This makes it clear that our great power is from God, not from ourselves.” ‭‭2 Corinthians‬ ‭4:7‬ Yeah… that’s about right. Don’t you feel as fragile as a clay jar at times? So many of us do. So I want to share with you some things I learned from Chrystal Evans Hurst. “Trials bring out the treasure in us.” We are in a state of tension right now. Chrystal taught that many times when we are dealing with tension, we are trying to remain hopeful about the other side of the difficulty we are walking through, while at the same time having to deal with the daily “real stuff.” We think, “If God is good, why didn’t He answer my prayer the way I wanted Him to. Why did He let that bad thing happen?” “Rejoice in our confident hope. Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying.” ‭‭Romans‬ ‭12:12‬ I know it’s not what any of us want to hear, but the struggles are doing something

  Today is the first day.   Today is a first day like none other. Today my son Isaiah starts college in a town we don’t live in… Without me. By himself. On his own. Out of my presence.   I know many of you think I have it all together and have constant faith that God will handle all “the things.” I do have big faith. But man! I have moments and sometimes full days of internal freak-out. My Mom heart/brain imagines every bad thing that could possibly happen to my kids. Especially the one with a brain injury. Although I know God saved him from death once, and I also know that doesn’t make him immune to another untimely death experience.   I also worry he won’t make friends. I worry he will fail his classes. I worry he won’t communicate his needs the way he should. I worry he will be lonely. I worry he will fall and get hurt. I worry he won’t be happy every second of the day. Ugh!   Although I worry, I am usually able to quickly remember when he was born, I acknowledged that he along with

One of the biggest struggles I believe many of us face today, especially in the world of social media, is keeping our mouths shut. . . or really, our fingers from typing. We see a post or comment that offends our sensibilities, and we feel the need to defend ourselves. It is very difficult to refrain from doing so, right? I learned from Shelley Giglio that God is the only defender we need. Did  you need to hear that as much as I did? GOD IS YOUR DEFENDER. She explained that God is not so much concerned about our circumstances. He is more concerned about us IN the circumstance. He is more concerned about the way we are responding, the way we are forgiving, and the way we are loving in spite of the circumstances. Did you catch that? “In spite of the circumstances.” So basically our response is far more important than what was done or said to us. That’s counterintuitive, isn’t it? Our instinct is generally to pounce first, then deal with the aftermath later. But that’s not what God calls

Over the weekend, I participated in a conference, called If: Lead. I heard from many speakers who had amazing things to say, and I would like to share a little bit with you today. What we are all going through right now is something none of us have ever experienced. Many of us are feeling some sort of way we can’t explain. There is anxiety we feel that is difficult to put a finger on. For me, it is dealing with the unknown, which is challenging to deal with directly, because it’s UNKNOWN! Dr. Anita Phillips explained, many of us are actually experiencing trauma through this pandemic. We are dealing with racial tensions, financial tensions, and so much uncertainty. Our nervous systems are activated in all of this and pulls on our bodies. There is fear, there is panic, there is pain. It’s not only causing emotional problems, but it’s also causing physical problems like fatigue, digestive problems, breathing problems, a racing heart, and more. So, we must make sure to take care of ourselv

The other day my husband and I dropped our two oldest children off at their college to begin their freshman and sophomore years. We are grateful that God rearranged some things in the universe, and they are now attending the same school. We listened to one of the speakers at the matriculation service speak about Ephesians 2:10 and how each of our children is God’s masterpiece. Each one has been “set apart.” To be set apart means to make someone or something different and special. He also talked about how the next four years will be their training ground as they prepare for their chosen career. I looked at my son and remembered that almost five years ago we weren’t sure if he would make it through the night, much less walk and talk. . . and today, he is attending college. I looked at my daughter and thought about how brave she was to stand up against racism, leaving a school and friends she loved so very much, to attend another in a town she never wanted to be in. Two masterpieces, set

It is rare for things to go exactly the way I’ve planned them. In fact, 99% of the time, something goes wrong in my plans. I’ve come to believe it’s the Lord’s way of keeping me humble. The times when life goes the smoothest is when I’ve let Him lead my steps. I very often forget to pray before planning or making decisions, and sometimes feel silly asking Him to help me make even the smallest decisions. However, I’ve learned, because He loves us, God wants to be invited to be present in every part of our lives. He created us in order to have a relationship with us. “This is what the Lord says— your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel: “I am the Lord your God, who teaches you what is good for you and leads you along the paths you should follow.” -‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭48:17‬ ‭ If we ask, He will show us. Have you noticed that almost nothing has gone according to plan this year? I’ve heard many people talk about how 2020 was supposed to be a year of perfect vision, and how that plan blew up in our fac

OK friends. There have been some major developments in our country in the last couple of days. So today I just want to remind you… BE KIND. I know we hear that a lot, and maybe we’ve become immune to the truth of what it means. We say it, but forget what that entails. Being kind sometimes means keeping your opinion to yourself or resisting the urge to post when your emotions are high. It could mean walking away from an argument or even being more concerned about someone else and their thoughts and feelings over your own. It’s important to remember that everyone is coming from a different place, and we don’t always know exactly what that place is, regardless of what it looks like. I believe it is possible to love people where they are, even if that is a very different place from where we happen to be. This current season will be over at some point, and wouldn’t you hate to look back when things have calmed down to see the fallout that could have been avoided if you had just chosen to be

The other day was my husband’s birthday. This picture is a snapshot of a video our oldest daughter took of me and my husband when we were dancing together (and subsequently shared with friends on Snapchat). It was a wonderful feeling, even though the night wasn’t what I had originally planned in my mind. I was extremely disappointed that we couldn’t have the type of 80s Hip-Hop (my hubby is from the Bronx. Birthplace of Hip-Hop) party we had hoped to have with lots of friends and family around, but we adjusted and celebrated in a different way. Friends and family got together for a Zoom Birthday Party. It was a time of dancing, laughter, and reminiscing through the music of the 80s. Leading up to the party, I had many moments that were just upsetting. Nothing seemed to go right, and then it didn’t go right again. Have you had days like that? Days where you are sure Satan put your picture on a bullseye and proceeded to throw darts at it? Yep. That was my day. But you know what? Througho

The question “Why does God allow bad things to happen to good people” came up again recently, so I am going to address it again. It’s got to be one of the toughest things to reconcile in the hearts and minds of humans. I don’t claim to have THE answer, but here’s what I do know. I have actually looked at other children or adults who have survived brain bleeds like my son Isaiah, and briefly felt ripped off because they had no residual effects from the rupture. I say briefly, because soon after that thought, came the realization, there was a different plan for Isaiah. I don’t believe God wants or makes any of these things happen to us, but He does allow them. Isaiah 55:8-9 explains it. “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither declares the Lord. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” Most of the time, there is no way we can possibly understand or even begin to see the bigger picture. That’s where faith

This quote spoke to me as I am continually having to push myself into my calling. We’ve talked about this before. Each one of us has a calling on our lives that is unique to each individual person. Sometimes that calling makes us stand out from others and may often make us feel like the odd one out. If you are anything like me, you may have felt “less than” the rest of them, or maybe just really uncomfortable with who God made you to be. I learned very quickly in life, I was not only different from those around me because I was usually the only one with brown skin, but different because I seemed to process the world around me differently than most. I was blessed with a group of girlfriends in my last two years of high school who got me...and even when they didn’t, they just loved and accepted me in all my goofy glory. As an adult, it has been much more difficult. I very often second guess my gifts and my purpose. I’ve had well-meaning friends try to steer me into a direction they felt

I know. It’s really difficult not to worry during this time, but I want to point something out. If you are reading this right now, then God has gotten you this far. It may not have been easy, but you are still here, which means He is not done with you yet. If you want to find peace, you are just going to have to make the choice to trust Him. The minute you try to take control of the situation, you set yourself back further from the perfect ending. I know because I’ve done it a million times. Another thing I want to remind you of. God sees the WHOLE picture… from the past, to the present, and all the way to the future. He really does love you enough to get it right all the way through to the end. I love the way the Message puts it. “If you decide for God, living a life of God-worship, it follows that you don’t fuss about what’s on the table at mealtimes or whether the clothes in your closet are in fashion. There is far more to your life than the food you put in your stomach, more to you

Do you feel torn? I do. There are so many things pulling me from what feels like every side. I am a woman, so I feel like I should speak out for women, and join some kind of pro-woman task force. I am black, so I feel like I should be marching in the streets, demanding justice for my black brothers and sisters. I am a Christian. I want to represent Christ, but I am also embarrassed by the unloving behavior of so many people who call themselves Christians. I have and love children. I want to fight for and protect the children who are being used and abused for the pleasure of evil people. It’s a lot. So what do we do? The only thing I know to do for sure is go to the Source. God has not called me to be everything to everyone. That’s not your calling either. Take a minute to be still, and listen to where He’s calling you to go, and who He is calling you to be. The main thing we are called to do is further the Kingdom (Matthew 28:16), so we can’t go wrong there. It is important to stand up

This Covid thing has us twisted. Many of us have lost the vision for our lives we once had. Darkness and despair are hovering over our heads, and depression and suicide are on the rise. I know it’s not something people like to talk about, but are you struggling? When it’s difficult to foresee any kind of recognizable future, it can be easy to fall into hopelessness. It can also be easy to fall back into failures of the past. That’s exactly where the evil one wants us. Stuck. Today I am speaking to someone out there who is having a hard time knowing and believing they have value. Allow me to me remind you that you have been called to greatness. Yes, YOU. All the gifts God has given you have been trusted to you to use for your good and His glory. So use them! You are enough because He lives inside of you. He knows your name. He knows exactly who you are. He even knows how many hairs you have on your head (Luke 12:7), and He loves you deeply. God doesn’t care what you’ve done or how broke

Many of our lives are very different than we had planned them to be. It’s hard. Our world has been turned upside down. Some have lost a dream. Some have lost direction. Many have simply lost hope. It’s okay to grieve your loss or grieve what you had hoped would be. Your Creator understands. He made you to feel deeply. He weeps with you. However, it’s important not to stay in that place. Acknowledge your grief, then stand up with the power that raised Christ from the grave, and walk boldly into your new future. God is already there preparing the next chapter of your story. “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.” Psalm 147:3 I know… most of us have no idea what step to take next. That’s okay too. This may be a time to be still and just do the next thing. Take each day as it comes, trusting that God will lead you in His perfect time. Do you feel scared of the unknown? The unknown can certainly be scary, but you know what is not unknown? God’s goodness. He will continue to