Christina Speaks

I’ve had a very challenging first week at my new job. So, I really didn’t feel like writing anything at all today. I’m exhausted. I was just going to tell you guys that I’m taking a break. However, you have become a part of my life, and so I’m going to share this part of it with you. Much of the difficulty came in the form of a young girl. I won’t go into all the details, but she is troubled. She struggles with authority and unfortunately disrespected the wrong person yesterday. They were going to send her right back home to finish school online for the rest of the year, and believe me, the thought of it excited me a little bit. I wouldn’t have to deal with the energy or my sanity sucked out of me each day for 3 class periods! I could breeze through the day with the others who do just what they are asked to do, when they are asked to do it. But I think God may have tapped me on the shoulder and said something like, “Check yourself before you wreck yourself. You are not any better or di

A few weeks ago I shared with you that my husband Ozzy lost his job. I want to give you an update.   Let me start by saying, the Lord is faithful.  When we put our complete trust in Him, when we believe He can do more than we could ever dream for ourselves, it gives Him room to show up and show out.   The day he lost his job, a friend of mine sent me a video of a woman with an encouraging word... something she felt the Lord was speaking to her. Part of the message explained how God will often give you “double for your trouble.” Ozzy and I got excited. We weren’t sure if that word was for us, but we sure hoped so.   Close to a month went by before Ozzy got any calls for an interview. When he finally did, it seemed obvious which job God had for him. There were some things about it only God could orchestrate, and the same day he interviewed, he was verbally offered a job. He accepted. Such a blessing!   Then, ON THE SAME DAY I was offered a full-time (with benefits) job at the high school

The change of culture this pandemic has caused, has many of us discombobulated. Roles have changed, fears increased, much has been lost, and we all just really need a hug! If you are wondering, or have wondered what your place is in all of this, or if you even have a place let me ease your mind. You have a place here. God has plans for you. You are not a mistake. You are right where you are supposed to be, at just the right time. I want to share a thought with you that I got from Priscilla Shirer last week. Your limitations, weaknesses, and emotional quirks don’t scare God off or disqualify you from serving Him in a mighty way. God knows all of the tendencies in you. He factored all of them into the unique plan He has designed for your life. He will not ignore your needs and neuroses. He will work with them. He will continue showing what He can accomplish in you despite your human imperfections. I don’t know about you, but that gives me so much comfort and confidence. Think abou

I don’t know if there’s anything in my life that turned out the way I had planned years ago. Thank God! I definitely would not have chosen the path that He put me on, but I can’t say I would change anything. Though I did try to go my own way many times. I don’t think I can count how many times I exercised and used my “free will” as an excuse for disobedience. Have you ever done that? I have literally thanked God for the free will, reminded Him that He gave it to me, then did what I wanted to do. I essentially blamed him for my disobedience. The gall! It can be so hard to trust God, because all we can see are all of the circumstances right in front of us, and we worry that if we don’t take immediate action, all will be lost. It’s important for Christ-followers especially, to remember our struggle is not against flesh and blood (Ephesians 6:12), it is spiritual. The battle belongs to the Lord.  And here’s the thing... God sees EVERYTHING...past, present, and future. He knows the whole st

  We have got to be the most impatient people. Well, I can only speak for myself, but I am confident I’m not alone in that.  That’s got to be frustrating to the One who created us. I can’t help but think of my kids when they ask me for something I have already planned to give them.  I can’t always give it to them at the exact time they ask, or maybe I am waiting for a specific day, or time, or occasion. They will often ask for something again as if I didn’t hear them the first five times.  It can be frustrating. In my opinion, it shows a lack of trust. Maybe they think I didn’t hear them. Maybe they think they can wear me down. Sometimes, I don’t give any kind of hint that I am considering honoring their request. So they have been known to formulate a whole plan on how they will get what they want or need without me. Somehow they think they can take control of the situation and make it happen sooner. Don’t we do that to God? If we trust Him enough to bring our needs to Him, can’t we tr

“Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done.   Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7 This kind of peace is a true gift, and it’s ours if we choose to take it.  This is the peace I held onto when I believed my son would die. This is the peace I grasped when my husband lost his job. This is the peace I choose to live in each day. Having this peace is like a warm blanket in the middle of a cold night. When it’s wrapped around you, there is joy to be found in the midst of any situation. I know it can be difficult to trust God so immensely, but it can be done. You must choose it. He will not let you down. “I am leaving you with a gift—peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don’t be troubled or afraid.” ‭‭John‬ ‭14:27‬ ‭NLT‬‬

  So I was thinking yesterday. Shocker I know. I was thinking about how I never run out of things to talk about each day. That gives me a chuckle, because since elementary school, just about every teacher would write on my report card something like, “Christina is a good student, but has trouble not talking to her neighbors.” Ha! There was also usually at least one teacher every year, I would have an issue with. Part of the problem was, I was quite observant as well as introspective, so I always had “thoughts.”  Sometimes I recognized when a teacher was not being “fair” in any given situation, whether it had to do with me or even another student. So I would (respectfully of course) share my thoughts and feelings about said situation. Generally speaking, those thoughts were not appreciated, and it would create, well...problems. Sometimes I would need to bring those things to the attention of my parents. My mom was usually the one to handle it. She taught me at a very young age, how to a

Friends, we are deeply entrenched in spiritual warfare.   As humans, we seem to be very easily fooled into believing we are fighting for and about the most important things. We fight to say what we want, do what we want, demand what we want. We look at other people who are very different from us, or who believe different things than we do, and assume we are better than they are. We think they’ve got it wrong, so we must have it right.   Sometimes those beliefs are passed down from family members, or reinforced by friends. We often surround ourselves with people who believe just like we do, ultimately tricking ourselves into believing our circle represents what and who is right.  What does the Bible say?   “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility consider others as more important than yourselves.” Phil. 2:3   These issues we have with each other are rooted in evil. I know that is a strong statement, but anything not rooted in love, is usually coming from the evil

As I think back to my years growing up, and the struggle I had at times being a brown girl in a predominately white world, I have to smile. I don't know that I would have chosen it, but It wasn’t the worst thing. I am grateful for many of those circumstances and experiences that helped shape who I am today. God allowed me to have my own experiences, giving me a unique outlook… one that I can share with you. Though I rarely felt “good enough” and often allowed that feeling to hold me back and stunt growth in some areas, it also quietly pushed me and made me fight to some extent, for a place in this world I believed God had carved out for me. His voice was just loud enough to guide me toward a future rooted in Him. A future that continues to work for my good and His glory. I believed He could see something in me worth using, so I kept pushing, even when I couldn’t see it myself. Sometimes I still have difficulty with that even today, but I trust Him. For me, it was because my

One thing I know for sure is the past year has required change. Some of us were ready for it. Some of us were shocked by it. I myself was needing it and needed to see it.  I desired to be moved and hoped to be changed. Change is inevitable and something that will continue to happen until the day we die. We always have something to learn, and there is always room for change. To become the best version of ourselves requires work and reflection. It requires each of us to take an honest look at who we are, and who we want to be. . . Not who we want people to think we are. It’s difficult to know where to start, so the best thing is to ask God about it. “Search me O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life.” Psalms‬ ‭139:23-24‬  When we ask God to show us, we need to be ready to accept what He shows us needs to change. That can be very difficult. There are things I have learned abou

This is my beautiful boy Isaiah. As he and his sisters were growing up, we struggled to know how to prepare them for a world that would not always be fair or kind to them because of their brown skin. We struggled because we did not want them to carry resentment because of it. We didn’t want them to carry that burden of knowledge. We wanted to keep them in a beautiful bubble of butterflies, rainbows, and unicorns. Somehow, growing up Isaiah managed to self-quarantine in that bubble. He never saw differences between people. When he was in 3rd grade or so. We were talking after school one day about heritage. I mentioned something about being African American. He had a look of shock on his face and said, “What? I am African American?!” Then he jumped up and said, “I’ll be right back! I have to go tell my teacher!” We died laughing. Seriously? How could he not know? Self-quarantine. When he was older and in high school. I tried to explain how some people treat others because of the

The other day, a Facebook friend told me she felt that the more we talk about race, the more divided we become. I explained the importance of talking about it, so we can understand where each person is coming from and what they are dealing with. I later spoke with my 19-year-old daughter about it. She told me she agreed to a certain extent. She believes that if we don’t discuss the issues, they will never go away. However, she also feels that sometimes we focus too much on racism. I don’t disagree. People, especially young people, can be too quick to call “racism” in a situation that does not reflect such a thing. Racism is real and does exist, but we need to make sure to clearly identify situations concerning race. There are comments made that may be insensitive, ignorant, or prejudice (pre-judging), but that doesn’t mean they are racist. Continually calling people or situations racist that are not, create defensiveness and often shut down conversation that could have been product

One of the things I was concerned about as I headed into ministry, was the vulnerable position I would be in while sharing my thoughts and beliefs with the public. However, I have committed to a life of authenticity and never want to live any other way. I have found, what many people desire from me is a feel-good message of hope, joy, and love. No problem, because all of that is found in Christ, and is an important message to share.  However, a life of following Christ is not always comfortable, and sometimes the truth (including my own), is difficult for people to hear and accept. I have found that to be especially true as a black woman in ministry. So many, want to overlook who I am, and would rather I not talk about the difficulties and truths facing people of color.  It makes some people uncomfortable. That often makes me hesitant to share those truths, but as I said, I am committed to living and sharing an authentic life. Some may have read a post of mine that made them feel good,

Well, it’s Black History Month. Some may be excited by that, anticipating learning things they didn’t know before, and some may be rolling their eyes wondering why “they” get their own month. Some may be moving their cursor to hit “unfollow” at this very moment. Growing up, I felt embarrassed every February when my white classmates would inevitably look to me for some special insight on the people we were learning about because obviously I should know more since they were “my” people.   I didn’t know much about the contribution of people who looked like me, past the fact that we were slaves, could run fast, make memorable speeches, and invented a variety of things made from a peanut.  I hated Black History Month. I hated it, but now understand why we need it. History has historically been a look back at the highlight reel of white men. White women have often been left out as well. I am still learning about the contributions of white women and other people of color, to this country.  Ma

I can’t tell you how many times I have been paralyzed by the fear of doing things wrong.  I often feel that if the sky hasn’t opened up, presenting a white dove, carrying a note straight from God, I can’t be sure I’m doing what He wants me to do. Okay, maybe that’s a slight exaggeration. But really, it can be so scary to do the things we believe God has called us to do.  Sometimes we forget how big God is. If we head in the wrong direction, He can handle it. He can fix it. He can and will redirect us. “Your own ears will hear Him. Right behind you a voice will say, “This is the way you should go,” whether to the right or to the left.” Isaiah 30:21 Is there something paralyzing you today? How will you step out in faith, trusting God to guide you?